Lost child, please check collar for Owner’s name

Yesterday I wrote about being dizzy – having the sense of too much to do and too little understanding of how to get it all done. Want to guess what the Lord addressed? Gee, what a surprise….my heart. And did He go after the “easy” stuff, like “Get more rest, you’re just too tired?” BAH! No, He went right to: “MY yoke is easy – SO, whose yoke YOU got on?!” UGH!

So, there I sat, in the van, waiting for Jeff to change the tire and I said, “I don’t know – whose yoke DO I have on?” “Your own.” “MINE?!” “Yep, you don’t trust Jeff to do the job well. You don’t trust ME to work in Jeff. You’re trying to take on things that aren’t yours to do. When you release those things, when you stop trying to control things, you won’t be nearly so dizzy.”

(Now, may I stop and say something here? Is it only me that wonders why I must totally humiliate myself, sharing in “public” how I’m struggling with this dizzy thang, only to have to then endure humiliations GALORE of sharing that it’s my own dumb fault?!! 🙄 Zheesh)

So, today, what comes to mind in my quiet time? “When the people saw that Moses delayed to come down from the mountain, the people assembled about Aaron and said to him, “Come let US….” Ahhh, the desire to control reigns and rules in the heart of man and once again, I too am an obstinate people….

You know, when we started on this adventure and the Lord directed both Jeff and I separately to study Exodus while we go through this, I didn’t expect to find myself/ourselves quite so often in the pages of the Word. Obviously I was wrong.

So, now I’m in the position of opening my hand and allowing God and Jeff to do their part – and I am free to focus on my part. (A totally different blog that I’m soon to write) Should the Lord lay it on your heart to inquire as to my faithfulness in keeping my eyes on Father and my head in the proper yoke, I’d sure appreciate it. Something tells me I’m not done being an obstinate people.

10 Responses to “Lost child, please check collar for Owner’s name”
  1. Violet says:

    Oh Dawn, I mulled through what to write in response to your “dizziness”, but hesitated because I was afraid it might come out wrong! The Lord “wrote” on your heart the perfect answer – as always. The reason I felt that I could say something was because I have been through the process myself. The Lord ended up putting me flat on my back for a lengthy period of time before I finally GOT it (then!). The children were young and I was sure the world could not function without me. But I was wrong. Now every time I overextend myself (and, yes, I still do it), my body has a built-in way of saying “No”, loud and clear. You are so blessed to have learned this lesson before you reached that point. I will definitely be praying for you in this adventure.

    The verse the Lord gave me last night as I was thinking through your post was Matt. 11:28, 29 – imagine that! Then for my good-night reading I was in Heb. 12. Verses 10 and 11 were especially appropriate: “…but he [chastens] for our profit, that we might be partakers of his holiness. Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless AFTERWARD it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.” (emphasis mine) I’m looking forward to that peacable fruit of righteousness!

    One other practical thing that helped me was to list out all my activities. Then I went through them carefully, noting whether or not this was something only I could do (i.e. be the wife of my husband, mother of my children, etc.). It was amazing how many things I was doing that others could replace me at! When I pared away all the things I could delegate or just let go of, then I again reevaluated my time and with the Lord’s and my husband’s help added (slowly) the other activities that there was time for. I have found that God always gives the strength and wisdom for what He intends for us to do. Now if I would just remember that!

    Praying for you. Would you please pray for me too?

  2. Kim's Vineyard says:

    I have been thinking hard on Exodus as well! Really Chapter 3 when the Lord does these things…He sees, hears, is concerned, and comes down!

    Whew! I really love that! How can I focus on “me” when crying out to God will acheive that kind of result? Well, I still can find ways, as I am seldom without myself to focus on! But when I read that, I makes me want to trust, wait and let go.

    I don’t have to figure out a way to turn the Nile to blood, or gather an abundance of frogs, or even gnats. I just need to prepare my home under the Blood of the Lamb with my cloak girded ready for my next calling.

  3. Margie says:

    Dear Dawn, Thank you so much for suffering this public humiliation. For you see, my dear, I am seeing so much of myself in your post. I am wearing the wrong yoke too. I have been trying to come to God’s defense when faced with Bill’s continual questions regarding faith. I think I have actually tried to manipulate things to make God look good and faithful. OH MY!!! If that is not wearing my own yoke I don’t know what is.

    I posted a message to you on your Xanga, but I am not sure that you saw it as I know that you said you were having trouble signing in to Xanga at one time. I wanted to let you know that I don’t have your personal email (or at least I don’t think I do). I had something that I wanted to share that God keeps placing on my heart.

    Also, a heads up that I just posted on the prayer line a request for our family.

    Thanks dear sister for being so transparent. It is such a blessing!~Margie

  4. javadawn says:

    Violet – OH HONEY – don’t EVER hesitate to speak Truth to me. Even if it hurts, I’ll still appreciate hearing it!! I too felt the Lord leading me to assess each activity according to whether or not it is something only I can do or something that others can do.

    I found that in seeking this whole new way of life, there were too many things I was leaving for my children to do that were mine to be doing. (ie: allowing my oldest to parent WAY too much! By God’s grace, He showed this to me BEFORE we had a major problem on our hands.)

    I will happily pray for you! I will pray for you when I pray for myself….you ought to be getting LOTS of coverage. 😉

    Kim, what you shared is KEY to what the Lord is impressing on me. When *I* am trying to control things, I’m going to miss out on the miraculous that HE is attending to. There will be too many things that *could* have been blessings, because He did a great work, that I missed because I had my fingers in the midst of it. What a sad thing to allow to pass by us! (That alone helps me want to stop being controlling and just let the Lord do His thang!!)

    Dear Margie, I’ll just send off a response to you on the prayer group. Many hugs, my dear. Many hugs!!

  5. Jennifer says:

    Birds of a feather . . . Must be why I keep coming here to read what you write. 🙂 When God first called us into missions and we were trying to figure out which mission board or which country, I just knew I was supposed to help out. (Stop laughing!) So I spent hours researching mission boards and specific support jobs in specific countries. And I was emailing my husband information and reporting back to him at dinnertime all that I was learning. I was talking to other missionaries — interviewing them? interrogating them? And in spite of all MY work and research, we still didn’t have clear direction. It seems God didn’t exactly need my help to direct my husband. And one day, God very much impressed that upon my heart. So I repented and told my husband that I was finished “helping” with this decision and that I was going to be quiet and move out of the way and trust God to lead my husband and trust my husband to follow. Boy oh boy! It was tough! 🙂 I still had so much knowledge left over from all my research. ha ha ha And let me assure you, it took an act of the Holy Spirit to hold my mouth shut! But God was and is faithful, and He has and is directing my husband. Without any help from me, believe it or not. LOL

  6. javadawn says:

    Jennifer, Isn’t it amazing how only one person can be on the throne at a time? 🙄 I keep thinking it should be me, obviously.

    You know, the funny thing? I really perceived what I was doing as HELPING. I really thought I was offering Jeff some help – when in fact, it was my heart that became suspect. SNEAKY thing that heart is. 😕

    Hey – uh, would you pray for some of that Holy Spirit mouth glue to be around me too?!!! 😉

  7. jennifer says:

    🙂 I am so glad to know I’m not the only one with “helping” issues. Reminds me of my oldest daughter who likes to “help.” Often, though, she will ignore the specific thing I asked her to do in order to “help” by doing something else. And then her feelings will get hurt when I speak to her about not doing what I asked her to do. “But I was just trying to help,” she will say. And my standard response has become, “It’s never helpful to disobey.”

    Duh! Seems like there are some spiritual applications there somewhere. 🙂

  8. deborah says:

    jennifer! i could have written that exact post about my oldest daughter ‘helping’ but disobeying in the process. 🙂 i don’t know how many years we went through that……she’s much better now, but WHEW did that ‘helping’ thing ever get old! hey wait….maybe God was trying to tell me something and i missed it all those years ago?? hmmmm…..

    dawn…why DO we think we have to help God? do we think he isn’t big enough to take care of everything all by himself? that he can’t handle the logistics, the research, the weighing of the pros and cons??

    you’ve had some excellent posts. thanks so much for opening your hearts to us all ((dawn))!

  9. deborah says:

    oh sorry, that was supposed to be ‘heart’ not ‘hearts’….as if you had more than one 😕

  10. javadawn says:

    deborah, dear, I think that I have enough duplicity in my heart that “hearts” doesn’t seem too wrong. 😕

    We too went through the whole concept of “helping” with our oldest – we’re now in the throes of it with our 3rd child. It seems especially a problem for daughters, doesn’t it?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: