To bounce or be bounced, that is the question
When is the last time you played pinball? WHAP! The little ball goes whirling away in one direction. It comes slowly down and PING! off it goes again. BINK! off one edge, bouncing off the another. A well placed ball can go on forever, being sent to and fro all over. They have no purpose, they have no plan and they make no changes in the board. Their entire “existence” is one of being tossed about.
I think I am a pinball.
Many times in the past few weeks, I have felt that life was controlling me. There were many moments when I felt that I was truly nothing more than a pinball – being whirled and slammed from one side of the board to the other. “Surely Father, You have called me to more than the life of a pinball?!!” has been the cry of my heart many times.
As I have become more aware of this sense of being tossed about, outside of my control, I have become aware that this seems to be epidemic. What is going on? Why is it that most of Christendom is being thrown about, not of their own volition, from one thing to another?!
So, I have taken this up with my Master. “Father, my life is out of control. Every thing that is happening to me is being perpetrated TO me. I have no say in any of this. Lord, is this Your plan for me? Is this a breaking of me, to allow You more control of my days? Lord, I know with all my heart that every minute of every one of my days is run through Your fingers, like sand…. I know that there is nothing that comes anywhere close to me that hasn’t been allowed by You, so what is this new sense of being tossed about like a stuffed animal in the dryer?!!” I asked the first time and I heard nothing….I asked again….nothing. I continue to seek Him for answers…He has spoken quietly and gently and He is leading me, but still I ask and seek…..
I still do not have all the answers I seek, but I know this one thing. It is indicative of the hour. You see, the fields are ripening – even as I watched the pears on my neighbor’s tree ripen, one at a time this last summer, so too are the fields of my Lord. Just as my neighbor’s beautiful golden pears fell one after the other to the ground to rot, so too will those that are ripening in the fields surrounding our busy lives. Something HAS to give. The Bride of Christ can no longer be so busy – so utterly taken with the things of life that we are not able to reach out to those that Father has placed in our path.
Just so you’re warned, this has been the prayer of my heart – to grasp a vision – an understanding of what is to be done to stop this perpetual motion that the Bride keeps finding herself in. This is the crux of much of what Father and I have talked about during the past few weeks. How do we stop the whirlwind that many of us are on? (It’s not like we are racing around like this for fun…it’s not like we enjoy it. I hate the feeling of everything happening TO me, with no chance of stopping it and slowing it or changing it.) AND this will be the general focus of my blogging, as I process through what it means to slow the race and seek wisdom and understanding for how my days are to be spent.
I do know that part of it has to do with what we’ve been taught and what we’ve believed about those things. There are many lies that have been foisted upon us and we MUST root them out and turn instead to the Word for Truth and reality. Over the next few days/weeks as I continue to wrestle through, I’m going to share some of what I feel like Father is speaking to our hearts….to my heart. I pray that you would find that the questions challenge you – stir your heart – and call you to draw near to hear what He would speak to your heart as well.
If the Lord is rattling some of those lies in your heart already – if you are finding that you are tearful at the thought of BOINGING your way through the remainder of your life, please, let’s share what is on our hearts – let’s go to the Word, let’s knock again and again until our Lord answers and gives direction. For the fields are whitening as unto harvest….we daren’t be too busy to bring that harvest in! ” He who gathers crops in summer is a wise son, but he who sleeps during harvest is a disgraceful son.” We CAN’T miss the harvest!!!!!
If you have already wrestled with all this, PLEASE, share what you have learned. I’m eager to grow in wisdom and understanding about this!!!