HEY! You found me

Not only did I freshen things up around here (and no doubt, I’ll be doing more of that) I even made some cupcakes to go with the java.  You know me – chocolate and coffee.  Help yourself.

Thanks for making the effort to come.  I really appreciate that.

It feels kind of “odd” blogging here.  When I first started blogging at She Said, I would find that I signed in to blog here.  Now, that I’ve gotten used to writing there, it took me aback to look up and suddenly see Java Dawn in large blue letters again.  Silly as it may seem, it’s almost like renewing an old friendship.  Yeah, I thought it sounded corny too.  (Although I’m not above corny – but I bet you hadn’t noticed that, huh?)

This morning seems to be the day of renewing things for me.  I have some books due at the library, that I’m not done with.  I’m going to have to renew those – or spend the whole day reading  (HELLO?!!  No, wait.  Dawn, you have work to do and school, and laundry, and… isn’t there something somewhat abnormal when you become your own party pooper?!!)  I just noticed that my driver’s license will need to be renewed soon.  I have a friend that the Lord asked me to email that I haven’t spoken to in a long time.  (Not that we were upset with one another, but rather that we’ve both been too busy)  And at the encouragement of another friend, I renewed my “relationship” with “My Utmost for His Highest.”  (Thank you Sarah)

But, the thing that is needing the greatest renewal this morning is my mind.  (And no, the events connected with She Said have nothing to do with that.)  (VERY tongue in cheek)  This morning, my mind is cluttered and heavy.  It’s heavy enough with all these crazy surging thoughts, that if thoughts had weight of their own, I’d be walking with my head down somewhere near my waist, I think.

There isn’t any one thought that I can grab ahold of and wrestle with.  It’s the combination of many chasing thoughts, racing in circles – not unlike watching freshly mown wheat “crumbs” whirling in the wind.

Sitting in my prayer closet this morning, pen in hand and tears very near the surface, I asked Father, “What is my deal?!! Is this hormones?  Why does it feel like there is no measure of lucid thought to be found in my head?  Why am I once again concerned that any ticking I hear could well be indicative of the impending explosion of my brain?!!!”  No answer came.  I was so frustrated.  Why does this always become a battle ground for me?

Giving up, I grabbed up Sarah’s recommended friend, Oswald Chambers and I began to “talk” to him.  There he spoke to me:  “We are apt to forget that a man is not only committed to Jesus Christ for salvation; he is committed to Jesus Christ’s view of God, of the world, of sin and of the devil, and this will mean that he must recognize the responsibility of being transformed by the renewing of his mind.”

Ahhhh, so today, despite all the other responsibilities I may have…today, I will speak to Father about the renewing of my mind.  The strengthening resolve to take my swirling thoughts captive and make them obedient unto Him, that I might end this day, preparing for bed and realize that not only has the cerebral cacophony ceased, but I have been transformed.

For His glory  ~ Dawn

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Comments
3 Responses to “HEY! You found me”
  1. Violet says:

    Hi Dawn,

    It’s good to meet you back in old familiar territory again – not that you didn’t make it comfy over at She Said.

    Oswald Chambers is one of my favorite sources of encouragement and conviction. I remember once Elisabeth Elliot remarking that “My Utmost for His Highest” was a best seller. She wondered out loud if people actually read what he wrote, since so much of his writing is very pointed and convicting. I have to agree. Maybe it’s like the Bible in so many homes – a nice book to have on display but not one to take seriously and actually read with the intention of applying.

    Here are a couple tidbits Chambers wrote for Sept. 9 and 10 in “Run Today’s Race”: “We impoverish God in our minds when we say there must be answers to our prayers on the material plane; the biggest answers to our prayers are in the realm of the unseen (Ephesians 6:12-13).” “Worry is nothing in the world but personal irritation with God because I cannot see what He is after–only I don’t call it that, I talk about ‘an overwhelming burden of care.'” That last one was written directly to me! I’m with you in praying for constant (i.e. moment by moment) renewing of the mind.

  2. pauseforamoment says:

    I love Chambers, too, even the ‘ouch’ factor. I want the real meat that gets into you and changes your heart and and and soul and spirit. He does that. Good to see you here again, Dawn – I will join you in one of those cupcakes! 😉

  3. javadawn says:

    I know, I know – Chambers always seems to hit me in the face – as does Tozer (OUCH) Bridges and Piper. All of whom I have sitting in my reading basket. And they all do it by sneaking up on me and just PLOWING me in my classic Roman nose. (Read: big schnoz) 😀

    As for the cupcakes – since you’re not imbibing in java with me, I’ll join you for a cupcake and a cup of tea. Violet got me started on this wonderful Jasmine tea – won’t you join us, Miss Val as we delight in it?

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